The Post-Male Future

J.Brent©1993

Did you read about the predicted demise and degeneration of the male chromosome? Not just in humans but in ALL species. That in a million years or so ALL animals will be exclusively female.

I don't get it. How are animals going to procreate if there are no males to inseminate? OK, human females have got a way out via technology, but what about the rest of nature's creatures?

When the day comes when the last male of the species dies, how is Mother Nature (who is also 100% female now) going to fix the dilemma?

Maybe it'll be like frogs, who can change sex at will according to the community's needs.

Somewhere in this "post-male future" there's this Amazon frog scanning the information superduperhighway want-ads:

[southern belle accent]

"Hmmm, (dribbit) there sho' seems to be a big demand for fertile male mutants these days. (dribbit) Maybe I should do my civic duty and become a man, for just a little while, mind ya, to come to the aid of those poor damsels in distress."

So she goes in the other room:

[grunts and groans "growing pains"]

[thumb emerging from fist at crotch level mimes growing penis]

"I wanna grow a dick. I'm growing a dick. I can feel it growing. I'm growing a BIG dick, a big LONG dick."

[more grunts and groans]

(aside)"God, this evolution takes eons!"

So pretty soon...

[stomping, hands like pistons at sides]

BOM BOM BOM BOM

[robocop stance]

"THE INSEMINATOR!"

[mime carrying a BIG fire hose from crotch]

[mime spray the whole room]

RAT-A-TAT-TAT-etc.

 

Next week this ad appears:

FERTILE MALE: Females seeking impregnation may apply from 9 to 5 daily. Certified highest quality semen. Ask for BULL.

(very low DRIBBIT)

Standard rates apply. Kinky stuff extra."

*

Or else maybe those future post-male females won't even need a partner. They'll just be able to self-inseminate every time they masturbate.

Sounds great doesn't it? Every time you cum you get pregnant!

[Fake orgasms]

(Aah, aah. Oh my god! Oh my god!)

Twins

Multiple orgasms would net triplets

(aah, Aaah, AAH!)

or quadruplets

(Oh, NOOO!),

The Jackson Five,

[SCREAMING!]

(AAAH, OHMIGOD, AAAAAH!!)

The whole frigging Brady Bunch!

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

 

7



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